Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Singledom and the fetishists you meet

Being single lets you see parts of the world that you wouldn't otherwise see.

For instance, it's something that people joke about, but I had no idea there were real foot fetishists. At least, enough of them that they would contact me on a dating site:

"I hope I dont freak you out to what I'm about to say but

I was wondering if you'd like to chat. I'm not looking for sexual intercourse. I'm looking to explore my fetish. Foot fetish that I'm wondering if you're curious as well? I bet you'd like to have your toes sucked don't ya? wb if you're intersted..unfortunately we can't chat unless we save each other as fav's. Hope to hear from you"

Another guy from 700 miles away wrote the following brief missive, "Have you ever played tennis with a laundry hamper on your head?" and his profile picture was in fact of him playing tennis with a laundry hamper on his head. He mentions laundry hampers three more times in his profile.

I saw a profile on Craig's list in another city that I sometimes spend time in, for someone looking for a long-term relationship with a bisexual because he likes to wear women's clothes. He seemed really nice, and since in high school and college I went through that feminist stage where I saw all gender as a meaningless social construct, I thought I shouldn't hold his transvestitism against him, so I contacted him. We emailed a bit, and after awhile he started to seem really confused about his sexuality. I guess I picture transvestites as the typical psychologist's profile: straight-as-an-arrow men who relax at the end of their day by putting on women's clothes. He had actually gone out to gay clubs dressed as a woman to get picked up, but he assured me that he didn't enjoy it. Even if I believed him that he wasn't going to decide one day that he was gay --- I've already had that happen --- I didn't even want to contemplate the disease risk, especially since he sounded wishy-washy enough that all the sex might not be protected. Also, he was a struggling writer who didn't like his day job. I let the correspondence peter off, but then he got offended that I didn't want to keep emailing.

The foot fetishist actually wrote to me back in December. By March, I'd forgotten all about him, and got a second email.

i notcied something about one of your pictures.. you have the prettiest im have a nice arch...wb..let me know if you'd like to chat sometime...or if i freaked you out or

I was feeling friendly, so decided I may as well send a "no thanks," which he responded to by asking, "not even for me to massage your pretty feet or kiss a toe?.."

As tempting as it was, I turned it down.

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